


The Unloved Side

by Fangirlwriting



Category: Sanders Sides (Web Series)
Genre: Anxiety | Virgil Sanders is a Little Shit, Dark Creativity | Remus "The Duke" Sanders Is A Good Friend, Deceit | Janus Sanders Angst, Gen, He's Helpful Though, Hurt Deceit | Janus Sanders, Hurt/Comfort, Morality | Patton Sanders Cooks
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-30
Updated: 2021-01-30
Packaged: 2021-03-16 16:28:45
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,269
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29085390
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Fangirlwriting/pseuds/Fangirlwriting
Summary: Dealing with the aftermath of nearly being killed was not something Janus could say he was looking forward to.
Relationships: Anxiety | Virgil Sanders & Deceit | Janus Sanders, Creativity | Roman "Princey" Sanders & Deceit | Janus Sanders, Dark Creativity | Remus "The Duke" Sanders & Deceit | Janus Sanders, Deceit | Janus Sanders & Logic | Logan Sanders, Deceit | Janus Sanders & Morality | Patton Sanders
Comments: 14
Kudos: 70
Collections: TSS Fanworks Collective Discord: January Remix Challenge!





	The Unloved Side

**Author's Note:**

  * Inspired by [Choose A Side](https://archiveofourown.org/works/27050725) by [LostyK](https://archiveofourown.org/users/LostyK/pseuds/LostyK). 
  * In response to a prompt by [LostyK](https://archiveofourown.org/users/LostyK/pseuds/LostyK) in the [tss_fanworks_collective_discord_january_remix_challenge](https://archiveofourown.org/collections/tss_fanworks_collective_discord_january_remix_challenge) collection. 



Thomas had moved his and Remus’ rooms upstairs to the core sides commons. Janus wasn’t sure who told him he could do that. It was probably a request from Patton. Whatever the reason, it made part of his job easier. He could lock the other side away more completely, not leave any exits in case he or Remus needed to leave to talk to Thomas. Part of Janus was grateful.

The other part of him didn’t want to have to talk to any of the other sides ever again.

Remus had found him shortly after that had taken place. The other sides must have told him what happened. Janus didn’t know what he had expected him to do, but all that happened was that he sat down on the bed next to Janus. He didn’t say anything for a long time, and Janus eventually started to wonder if he was actually going to.

“…You want me to kill Thomas for you?”

“Well, that’s a terrific idea.”

“I’ll do it.”

“I’m sure you’ll try,” Janus said. Honestly, he wasn’t even sure if a side could kill Thomas if they tried. He hadn’t imagined any of them would ever want to, as that would mean they die too. He supposed if someone was going to try, it would probably be Remus.

Remus tipped his head over until it landed on Janus’ shoulder. “I want you to die,” he said, the lie a result of being in the room too long.

“Well, that makes one of us,” Janus said. “I’m incredibly fond of the idea.”

Remus didn’t say anything for another long moment. Janus was starting to grow concerned.

“Do you want to stay in here and hurl throwing stars at pictures of Thomas and Virgil?”

“I don’t think that will really make me feel better.”

Remus hesitated. “Pictures of Malice?”

Janus shook his head.

Remus paused. “I wouldn’t have picked you over Virgil,” he announced, as if that made the whole thing any better. Janus sighed.

“I just want to go to bed, Remus.”

Remus was quiet again. “Okay.” He stood up and walked over to the door, but didn’t actually turn the handle. Janus was about to ask him what else was wrong when Remus turned around again. “Can I stay?”

“When was the last time you bathed?”

Remus snapped his fingers and a layer of filth lifted off of him and vanished into the air. Janus’ lip curled slightly in disgust. A second passed in silence and he sighed. “Alright.”

Remus snapped his fingers again and both of them were in pajamas. He walked back over to the bed and tackled Janus onto it. Janus let him for the most part, although he pushed him back so they could both climb under the covers before Remus attached himself to his side again. For once, Remus didn’t say much until they both fell asleep.

…

Janus woke up to find Remus sitting on his desk chair and holding a plate of pancakes.

“Are those for you?” he asked as he sat up. “You normally like your pancakes with more dish soap, don’t you?”

“They’re for you,” Remus said, crossing the room and holding out the plate.

Janus stared at it for a second before narrowing his eyes. “I don’t need you to wait on me like I’m sick, Remus.”

“Yeah, I know. But do you really want to go outside and talk to anyone else?”

Janus considered the question for a second before he sighed and took the plate of pancakes. “I don’t want anyone thinking I’m too frail or shaken up or something.”

“They know you’re not,” Remus said, sounding like he meant it. “They also understand if you don’t want to speak to them ever again.”

“I don’t…” Janus said, and trailed off when he realized he didn’t know what he wanted. He took a bite of pancakes. “If you tell anyone how shaken up I actually am I will slit your throat. Twice.”

“No, I’m going to betray the trust of my only friend and ally, especially when he’s vulnerable.”

Janus leaned around and whacked Remus on the back of his head. “Don’t steal my thing. You haven’t been here long enough for the room to be affecting you again. I’m the sarcastic one.”

“You mean you’re not the sarcastic one?” Remus said, starting to grin a little.

“I will dump these pancakes on your head.”

“You and I both know I would love that.”

Janus sighed, because he definitely would. He stood and snapped his fingers to change into his regular clothes, moving to the desk to finish the pancakes. Eating in his bed would normally make him feel glamorous and waited on, but right now it was just making him feel like he really was sick.

He ended up spending most of the day with Remus, in his side of the imagination. They didn’t hurl any throwing stars at pictures of other sides or Thomas, but they did cause quite a bit of damage. It was, after all, always fun to burn down a couple cities when one was feeling angry or depressed.

They took a break to eat lunch, which Remus could make easily in the Imagination, and then spent the rest of the day either perfecting Remus’ torture chamber or building new weapons. They ate dinner the same way they ate lunch, and eventually Remus headed back to his room. He probably assumed Janus wouldn’t want him to stay overnight a second time, and he was right.

Unfortunately, Remus definitely would have been helpful with the problem Janus stumbled into when he arrived back in his room.

“Get out.”

“I need to talk to you,” Virgil said, standing up from where he must have been waiting at Janus’ desk.

“Congratulations. Fortunately for you, that is absolutely what I want to do right now, and I’m definitely in the mood to do you favors. Get out.”

“Janus, seriously,” Virgil said. “We need to talk.”

“Well, I most certainly cannot ignore you longer than you can talk,” Janus said, walking across the room and adjusting the covers on his bed as if they weren’t perfectly straightened already.

“Great, then I’ll sit outside the door and scream what I have to say for everyone else to hear too.”

“Right, because that wouldn’t be mortifying for you.”

“I have said several times now that we need to  _ talk. _ I don’t really care how it happens.”

Janus spun around. “Well I’m sorry, but you absolutely get to do that,” he hissed. “You absolutely get to tell me what is happening and when. That was  _ always _ on the table, and it especially is now.  _ Get out, _ Virgil.”

“Janus,” Virgil said, and he at least had the decency to sound a little guilty. “I just wanted to apologize.”

“For what?” Janus snapped, because there was no way he was going to let the shock he felt at that statement show. “You didn’t make any kind of decision. You just got chosen to live.”

“You’re right, I didn’t,” Virgil said softly. “Thomas still feels horrible, by the way, but I’m guessing you didn’t know that.”

Janus made note of the lie that came through. Perhaps Virgil had been in his room too long at this point. He should probably get him out, you know, for that reason. Not because he was already sick of talking to him or anything.

Virgil must have noticed the lie too, because he looked away and fidgeted uncomfortably. He sighed. “Look,” he said quietly. “I’m going to pretend I’m your biggest fan, but… I’m still not sorry that happened. Malice is…” He trailed off. They both knew what Malice was like, after all, and you couldn’t sum it up in a couple sentences.

“I… locked the other side of the mindscape away,” Janus said hesitantly.

“I hadn’t heard,” Virgil said. “Remus didn’t announce it to all of us during breakfast. He… he isn’t at all mad about the situation.” Virgil started pulling on the strings of his hoodie, likely still uncomfortable with being forced to lie. “I… I’m not mad either, by the way.”

“Why would you be mad?” Janus asked, turning to face the covers and starting to adjust them again. “Isn’t being someone Thomas cares for everything you’ve ever wanted?”

“Well, I’ve never wanted anything else in my life,” Virgil muttered. “And… and I don’t know how it feels, Janus.”

“How what feels?”

“…To be the unloved side,” Virgil said softly. Janus tensed up, gripping the blanket in his hands tighter. He didn’t say anything.

“I’m just… not sorry you have to deal with it,” Virgil continued. “It’s something every side deserves to go through.”

“Oh, and here I thought you hated me,” Janus muttered, smoothing out the blanket again.

“I don’t,” Virgil admitted. “But I don’t care about you either.”

“You know Virgil, that really makes no sense.”

“Tell me about it. I haven’t been trying to figure it out either.”

Janus sighed, and turned around again. “Seriously, Virgil. Get out. I absolutely want to talk to the side Thomas picked over me.”

“Fair enough,” Virgil muttered, shoving his hands in his hoodie pockets again. “But again, for the record… Thomas really hates that you’re still around.”

“Great. Well that makes everything fine then. Now,  _ out.” _

“Alright, I’m staying,” Virgil said, heading for the door. “And, for the record, I know there’s no chance it’s too early for this, but no one else wants to fix things with you either.”

With that, he opened the door and walked out.

Janus sighed and collapsed back on the bed, pulling his hat off and dropping it over his face. He took a minute to try and decide whether or not he actually appreciated the fact that he’d just had that conversation. Unsurprisingly, he got nowhere.

…

Virgil had been right in that it was definitely way too early for him to want to talk to the other sides. But the idea that there was a way forward from what had happened was one that Janus didn’t hate. It would definitely make Malice furious if they tried to work things out after all, and the last thing he wanted was to make Malice upset.

Janus ended up spending the next day in the same way with Remus, barring a probably-necessary-but-still-terrible conversation with Virgil. He spent the day after that the same way, and the day after that.

A week and a half passed before Janus woke up one morning and didn’t find Remus in his room yet. He glanced over at the clock on his nightstand and saw why, it wasn’t even seven in the morning yet.

While Janus’ normal routine would require him to roll over and go back to sleep, he tried for a couple minutes and got nowhere. Eventually he resigned himself to his fate, stood up, and shifted into his favorite outfit. He headed over to his desk and sat down to prepare himself for a long morning until Remus got there.

He lasted another fifteen minutes or so before he found himself incredibly bored. He looked at his door and considered for a second how likely it was that someone would be outside. Patton got up early to make breakfast for everyone, he knew. He was pretty sure Logan got up as soon as Patton finished making the coffee. But those were both kitchen activities. If he stuck to the living room he could watch a movie and be out the moment someone else showed up.

Janus sighed, climbed up, and walked over to the door and opened it.

All of his plans were foiled immediately due to the fact that someone apparently forgot to tell him the kitchen was just around the corner from his new doorway and in full view of all four sides that were already sitting at the table.

Janus could sense all of them staring at him, but it’s not like he could close the door again now. He sighed once again, inwardly this time, and started over to the kitchen where a plate of pancakes for everyone was sitting in the middle of the table.

“Pancakes once again?”

“I make them every Sunday,” Patton said hesitantly. “How… how are you, Janus?”

“Hungry,” Janus replied. “Remus has apparently decided to sleep in today, and unfortunately I cannot wait for however long he’ll take. So I’ll be taking some of those.”

“Of course,” Patton said, moving a couple of pancakes onto one of the two unused plates that must have been sitting there for that purpose. “Are you… going to stay?”

Janus scoffed and took the plate, grabbed a fork and started back towards his room. He hesitated at the edge of the kitchen. “Your cooking is excellent, by the way, Patton,” he said.

“Isn’t it?” Roman said, also sounding hesitant for once. “He really is a wizard in the kitchen.”

“He cannot be a wizard, wizards do not exist,” Logan said, sounding confused. “He is merely above average in the culinary skill set.”

“Logan, we’re really going to have to teach you how to recognize a figure of speech,” Virgil said, as Janus took the returning voices adding to the conversation as his cue to slip away.

He hesitated for a second in the doorway to his bedroom and turned to look back at the family sitting at the kitchen table.

Yes, it was definitely far too soon. But someday, Janus thought he would like to have something like that. And who knows, if Virgil was any indication, perhaps there was hope for the unloved side after all.


End file.
